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A sharp eyed follower of this space recently penned the following in response to my previous post lamenting the misuse of the word your and the slow march to extinction of I’m and I am thanks to Twitter.

I am publishing the letter in it’s unedited entirety in order to present an unbiased point of view blah, blah, blah…and it comes to us from a Mr. P. T. Sailorman who is a tattooed, vegetarian nautical type.  It reads thusly…

Dear Mr. Self Appointed Guardian of the English language and all around Smug Punk,

Regarding your recent attempt to right the current state of the English language you neglected to include my singular catch phrase which I should have copyrighted years ago.

It is as follows, ” I yam what I yam.”

No where in your piece do you mention the word “yam” as an acceptable substitute for I’m or I am.  Sadly, I too have fallen victim to Twitter’s nasty habit of truncating sentences and depriving all of us of the beauty that words can impart.

I got a lot of criticism from the Sweet Potato lobby regarding my use of the word yam.  They sued me but we eventually settled out of court as my attorney, a Mr. Bluto ( no last name given) was able to convince them of the error of their ways.  Justice once again prevailed and I am no longer hounded by fickle and capricious legal matters.

In closing, I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.  Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Sincerely,

Popeye T. Sailorman.

 

 

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